The rampant search for ‘happiness’ is a struggle that almost everyone on this tormented planet can relate to. A constant scramble for the coveted contentment to soothe our chaotic souls. We have invented countless methods in order to remedy our eternal search. Religion, self-help books, tv-shows that demonstrate our innate desire for life’s one simple requirement – love, of course.

What are we without love? The one concrete divider between humans and the rest of the natural world is our capability to express and feel deep, complex emotions. Namely, we can love.

We are nothing without our ability to connect, communicate and devote. We are social creatures, living within an increasingly divided and isolated society. Trapped behind our devices, forever indecisive with glitching attention spans.

I firmly believe that the longer you subject yourself to internal silence, your lack of personal discourse will be the barrier between you and your true happiness. We have been fed the lie, for at least the last decade, that we exist within our singular frame. We are not photographs – we are reels of film. Complex, forever being written, full of technicolour and open to a trillion different interpretations from a trillion different perspectives.

The notion of being ‘perceived’ in the modern day has become something of a subject of fear. But do remember, to be known is to be loved. You can never be known without opening yourself up to perception – to allow your select few to view you as you are. Broken, chipped and glued back together, over and over and over and over again. We are woven by our decisions and sealed shut by our inaction.

“The only way to find true happiness is to risk being completely cut open.”

— Chuck Palahniuk

It’s not a mystery to me that one of the main factors contributing to our generation’s aversion to happiness is the notion of putting off happiness due to the prospect of a perceived future paradise.

“I’ll be happy once I achieve [so and so].”

“I’ll be happy when I get to [such and such].”

“I’ll be happy when I’m with them.”

“I’ll be happy when I start feeling better.”

It’s quite unfortunate that this is the detrimental belief system of so many, and then they are left pondering why their present day is full of such melancholy.

There is no such thing as the future. There is also no point in one dwelling on the past. We constantly live within the present. The now. You will never reach this projected notion of the future, as we are stuck within our pocket of time and space. Thus, we must make our slice of reality one of comfort. Lay down a blanket and pull out your pillows – create your own paradise, right beneath your tired feet.

Then comes the furthering question – how do you construct your own comfort, when your mind is in ruins? As is the reality for the masses.

I suggest acknowledging that there is always beauty in the ruins. The sunlight will shine through the cracks, and tangled flowers will grow beneath the rubble, whether we notice or not.

Pain and love go hand-in-hand. They co-exist and cannot live separately. The true poetic star-crossed lovers in our lexicon. If you are always happy, you are never truly happy – that is the beautiful contrast of life.

You must trust me on this; there is never a truly ‘right’ time to allow yourself a taste of happiness. The right time is precisely always, and the right place is exactly wherever you are. We are the manufacturers of our reality; we are the universe experiencing the universe at every millisecond we are fortunate enough to be here.

I implore you intensely to choose happiness, as happiness is foremostly a choice you are actively making, in the same way we know that love is a choice. I sincerely understand the mental olympics it takes to drag yourself out of the darkness, hurdling through the rings of fire, careful not to touch the edges or sink to the bottom of the thick, black river. But choose to see the light. Hope is something that you must give yourself, to choose to tilt your head up while treading carefully through the dark tunnel, so that you might catch a glimpse of the light that will always be there if you look for it.

Make the decision to explore your murky mind, and do not run away from the monsters you will surely find. Face them with your sword and shield in hand – we all descended from warriors, fighting a far more fearsome creature than the mammoth now – ourselves.

Ensure to communicate these mind-dwellers you encounter on your journey to yourself, to all those closest to you. These aren’t scars to be hidden from this imperfect world, but battle stories to be shared and rejoiced in. Each marking in your mind is a testament to your strength and commitment to your truest self. Happiness stems from living openly and freely – hiding from yourself will aid nobody, most definitely not yourself.

And always, always remember the reason – love given is never wasted – whether to another lucky soul, or to oneself.